Dr Myles Munroe On; Love Yourself First
The most important pursuit in life is to be totally single. Singleness gives you time and opportunity to self discovery and self love.
Singleness is the foundation of all relationships and that includes you and your boss, parents and children, friends and colleagues and of course marriages. Also, how you get along on your job is totally dependent of your singleness.
Furthermore, singleness determines the quality of your relationships. Socially, personally and professionally. If you are having problems in your job getting along with people, that is a personal problem. Also, if you are having problems personally with your spouse, that is a sign that you guys are dealing with the problem of singleness.
More so, the most important relationship in life, is not inter personal relationship. Most of us get to focused with trying to get too close to other people. The most important relationship is intra-relationship. It is not important to develop a relationship with other people while ignoring yourself.
Sometimes we get caught up with learning other people but ourselves. We go forward living other peoples lives, or living what other people think we should be doing.
The most important person you should desire to know is you. We live other people’s expectations and allow society to create us.
Nevertheless, self-knowledge is the key to all relationships. Knowledge of your strength is important as your weaknesses. You need to know what you need to manage in your life, you have to know your weaknesses in order to be able to draft your decisions.
The most important person for you to love is not other people, but is you. We always talk about loving our neighbors.
A lot of us find it easy to say we love God, but don’t even know how to love ourselves. The bible says love your neighbor as you love yourself. But most often, we try to do one without the other. You cannot love your neighbor, when you have not even loved yourself.
Loving God qualifies you to self-love and self-love can give you the means to love others.
However, stop trying to love others more than you love yourself, that is why you get hurt. You need people to love you, when you don’t love yourself and when they stop loving you, you get hurt.
It is more important to love you, than to love them. So, when someone says I love you, do not reply with I love you too. But say “do you love yourself?” because if you cannot love yourself, you can’t love me.
Never go out there looking for love, because they can control you at any time.
7 ways to self-love
- Self-love is a result of self-discovery
- It is as a result of self-source: know where you came from. Source determines value. Hence you cannot love yourself without knowing where you came from. If you don’t know your source, you don’t know your value.
- Self-love, is self-worth. If you don’t know your worth, you can’t love yourself. This is why you keep buying things you don’t need to impress people or give your self-value because you don’t know your worth
- Self-love is a result of self-esteem. How do you estimate your value? Some people sell themselves so cheap. Some sell themselves on the platform of compromise, just to get attention. When you realize how much you are worth, you love yourself. Most people give out their self esteem so many times in exchange for something way below their standard. They haven’t self-evaluated their worth. Self-love is the most important love on earth.
- Self-love is a result of self-concept: Concept has to do with idea of pitchy. How do you pitch yourself when you don’t even know yourself? Most times our picture of ourselves come from other people. Don’t let people tell you how you look or tell you how to feel about yourself. Don’t let people talk about you, before you start talking about yourself. Tell yourself the things you would love to hear. Never accept anybody’s opinion of yourself. When you have these self-concept, people’s opinion will never touch you. When you don’t know who you are, people will tell you who you are not. Sign of self-hatred is when we do things to please others not ourselves.
- Self-love is a result of self-identity: when you know your identity, you fall in love with yourself.
- Self-love is a result of self-value. When you believe you are valuable, you fall in love with yourself.
This is why marriages don’t last, because they go into marriage looking for love. You go there because you already have love and you looking for someone to share it with.
Singleness is the most important relationship in the world. Singleness, means even though no one loves you, you still love yourself. You become your own best friend.
10 manifestations of self-love
- Self-confidence: when people who don’t love themselves, meet other who loves themselves, they call them arrogant
- Self-love is manifested in self respect
- Self-love is manifested in self-assurance
- Self-assertiveness: when a person loves themselves, they assert themselves. They know what they bring to the table.
- Self-love is manifested in self-motivation. When you love yourself, you make your own things happen.
- Self-love is manifested in self-values. A person who loves themselves, place themselves very high.
- Self-love is manifested with self-giving
- Self-love is self-affirmation: you congratulate yourself. If you wait around for other people’s approval, that is self-hatred.
- Self-love is manifested in self investing. Investment is a measure of value. When you love something, you invest in it.
Nonetheless, loving your self, is the best gift you can ever offer to yourself, your friends, family and the world.